So the past week I have been feeling very bad about myself. Not only because of the break-up, but because I am simply not happy with myself these past few years. How do you let go of something that clings on to you? How do you even get started? Well even though it may seem impossible at the moment, you can find strength within yourself no matter how bad the circumstances may be. Right now I am missing my old life like crazy, but I was not happy, and I have to remember that. I have made mistakes, but all that matters is the person that I am now, and what I stand for at this very moment in time. Since then however, I have discovered I am very good at video editing, photography, and social media. I have decided to pursue that. At my current job I work with small children. They always light up my day with their smiles, and more than anything else, the things you hear them say. Children are so happy, and that is something I miss feeling. True happiness. When we were younger, and it was Christmas morning, there was no better feeling in the world. The true, and genuine excitement that we felt then, sometimes gets lost with experiencing the world. But the truth of the matter is, is that we are always moving forward, whether we want to or not. I have move forward as a person, a woman, and a student.
One thing I will share is that I am completely excited for this Christmas. Because of my old job I have not been able to spend a lot of time with my family, but now I will have the time I wanted back. At my new job I work at the dojang I practice Taekwondo at. I am currently the office manager, and I love it. Working retail sucks, I will never do it again. I give kudos to the people who work retail, because it is a long, and stressful job. It takes away valuable time you spend with your family, and the pay sucks. Right now I have so much happiness in my life, but I find it difficult to enjoy it during this time. Maybe I will heal more over the next few months...Maybe I won't. But one thing is for sure, whatever happens, happens. If I can't get over this, then what else will I allow to hold me back in life? I cannot do that. I need to live while there is time to live. I am only 25 years old, and for the majority of my life I have held MYSELF back. No one else is responsible for my lost time, but me. The years I spent with my ex were happy years, and even though they were happy, I still was unsatisfied with myself. I need to regain or find self love...and I will.. Even though I feel weak now, I will pull myself back up, because I know I am a lot stronger than I think now. I have gotten through a lot, and I will get through this.
Aside from that I will post a link to the video I made for my Taekwondo school. It is my first promo video, but I really like it! It is promoting October's Belt Testing. Enjoy!!!!
Lion Choi's Taekwondo October Testing
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